{"id":2940,"date":"2020-02-27T02:37:15","date_gmt":"2020-02-27T02:37:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cinewipe.com\/?p=2940"},"modified":"2020-02-28T00:15:13","modified_gmt":"2020-02-28T00:15:13","slug":"the-invisible-man-review","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cinewipe.com\/index.php\/2020\/02\/27\/the-invisible-man-review\/","title":{"rendered":"The Invisible Man is even better when you haven\u2019t seen it"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"p1\"><strong><span class=\"s1\">I haven\u2019t seen the new horror film, which is excellent news for my imagination.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s2\">The Invisible Man is probably the best film I haven\u2019t seen this month. Just yesterday, I spotted a tweet from one critic (I wouldn\u2019t stoop so low as to read their full review) describing it as a \u2018spine-chilling thriller\u2019 and \u2018properly scary\u2019, even though they\u2019ve presumably watched more than five films in their lifetime. <\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s2\">Meanwhile, someone else on Twitter named Claire said it was so good she\u2019s thinking of seeing it a second time, and she\u2019s not even mentally ill. <\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s2\">Impressive though these PR-friendly quotes may be, I can afford The Invisible Man an even greater compliment: I can confirm that it\u2019s much better when you haven\u2019t seen it. <\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s2\">The film, which sees Jeff Goldblum step into a giant spray tan machine, before having his DNA spliced with a fly and emerging as a mutant freak, is easily the best film I haven\u2019t seen about a man stepping into a giant spray tan machine, having his DNA spliced with a fly and emerging as a mutant freak. At least I think it is. I haven\u2019t seen it, as I said. <\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s2\">It\u2019s one of those films that only improves in retrospect, with each scene I haven\u2019t seen\u00a0playing over and over in my mind, until the non-existent images embed themselves in my cortex crevices, like moist shit in the grooves of a Range Rover tyre. <\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s2\">My favourite scene is where Goldblum, having been transformed into a mutant fly freak, finds himself sitting on half a dill and prosciutto sandwich, rubbing his grubby front legs together like a pervert trying to start a fire, only to be chased around the room by a massive, rolled-up newspaper. \u201cAhhhh! Ahhhh!\u201d he probably screams. It\u2019s a fantastic piece of cinema. <\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s2\">The script, acting, directing, cinematography, editing, lighting, sound mixing and special effects are also infinitely better when you haven\u2019t witnessed how bad they probably are. In fact, on that basis, I could go as far to say that The Invisible Man is one of the best films I\u2019ve never seen, as I\u2019m able to imagine absolutely anything other than what it actually is. <\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s2\">That is the liberating feeling I get to enjoy as a direct result of staying in and having<\/span><span class=\"s2\">\u00a0four wanks, rather than going to the cinema where the coronavirus is almost certainly waiting for me.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>The Invisible Man is in cinemas now.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I haven\u2019t seen the new horror film, which is excellent news for my imagination. The Invisible Man is probably the best film I haven\u2019t seen this month. Just&#8230; <a class=\"list-more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/cinewipe.com\/index.php\/2020\/02\/27\/the-invisible-man-review\/\">Continue reading <i class=\"fa fa-angle-double-right\"><\/i><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2941,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"image","meta":{"_FSMCFIC_featured_image_caption":"","_FSMCFIC_featured_image_nocaption":"","_FSMCFIC_featured_image_hide":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[13,3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2940","post","type-post","status-publish","format-image","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-featured","category-reviews","post_format-post-format-image"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>The Invisible Man is even better when you haven\u2019t seen it - CineWipe<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I haven&#039;t seen The Invisible Man, which is excellent news for my imagination.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/cinewipe.com\/index.php\/2020\/02\/27\/the-invisible-man-review\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Invisible Man is even better when you haven\u2019t seen it - 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