Just seconds into Christopher Nolan’s latest film Dunkirk, I knew it was better than me. A young soldier examines some Jehovah’s Witness leaflets before being interrupted by a… Continue reading

While dangling from a branch of my favourite tree, I often wonder what it would be like to be human. I envisage myself wearing trousers and doing human… Continue reading

The other day, while I was having a shit, I watched a spider try to crawl out of the bath plughole. It had the sort of morose demeanour… Continue reading

It is far too warm to watch Transformers: The Last Knight. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I’m going to die soon, so the last thing I… Continue reading

I have a lot in common with the main character in Baby Driver. I, too, frequently fantasise about being an action hero and pretend I’m being backed by… Continue reading

As our world splinters under the tyranny of corporate hegemony, this Marvel classic gives us hope that maybe just one billionaire will go insane and rescue 12 refugees I’ll… Continue reading

When Wonder Woman barged into a small French village, deflected gunfire from German bastards with her magic bracelets and then punched the steeple off a church to take… Continue reading

About half way through Wonder Woman I was extremely disappointed to discover I was watching a superhero film. Initially, I was touched by its inspirational message for young… Continue reading

Baywatch is a tragic drama about a film that should have been a self-aware parody of itself, but audaciously ended up trying to tell an actual story. Instead… Continue reading

Pirates of the Caribbean: Salazar’s Revenge is the thirty-eighth film in the series which sees Captain Jack Sparrow return to the role of Johnny Depp, a drunken pirate… Continue reading